Quips & Tips
Inspiration for parents, teachers, counselors, and mentors of
girls

#2

I’m not giving up on [men], but . . . I can be alone and be happy. With books and music . . . I don’t get lonely. I’m my own hobby, honey.—Whoopie Goldberg, actor

In this couple-obsessed culture, so many girls believe they’re worthless (or worth less) if they don’t have a special someone. This is especially the case in February, and it reaches a fever pitch on Valentine’s Day. who don’t have a sweetie to send them roses or chocolates are liable to mope and envy the girls who do.

If you know a solo girl who’s having a hard time with Valentine’s hype, share Whoopi’s quote (from The Girls’ Book of Love) with her. Then tell her that contrary to popular ideas, it could be a very good thing that she isn’t romantically attached this Valentine’s Day (or any day for the time being). That’s because the teen years are exactly the time girls have an opportunity to discover who they are as individuals, before moving on to life as part of a couple. During this critical time period, it does a girl good to focus on herself: her goals, developing a wide base of skills and self-esteem, and doing well in school. Having a boyfriend can often derail that focus, causing her to back off academically and lose sight of her dreams for her future.

If your daughter, niece, or young friend is pining away because she doesn’t have someone to cuddle with on the 14th, give her a card with Gloria Steinem’s famous quote: “A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.” Or maybe it should be a bicycle without a fish? What going-places girl needs one when there are so many in the sea?


Copyright by Catherine Dee

Organizations: You're welcome to reprint this material free; please credit Catherine Dee.

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Quips & Tips #3